"One swan is deceiving us all, oh I for one should know"
Every day it's sunny here.
Every. Single. Day.
I can't escape it. I can try by closing the blinds and shutting the curtains, but that doesn't mean that the sunshine doesn't find a way inside. Or it doesn't mean that I can't still feel the heat in my bedroom roasting me underneath my sheets.
And because it's sunny every single day, I get annoyed that it never rains, or that it's never grey. There's no pleasing me when it comes to the weather.
Last night when I was briefly speaking to Momma before she went to sleep, I told her that it has been over a month since I've been back, and I've only gotten one stupid email from the stupid HR lady who seems to have disappeared and never responded back to me. Over a month I've been back!
She corrected me and told me that it hasn't been a month yet. I got back on the 11th of June. It'll be a month on Saturday and then I can start moaning about how it's been over a month.
It feels like it has been over a month though. It feels like I've been back three months. It feels like I'm really bored and if I don't get some kind of brain stimulation soon that requires me to leave the house every day and earn a paycheck, I might just go completely insane.
The house is different than the flat in many ways. I'm alone a lot more, sitting here trying to find ways to occupy my time. I'm pretty much broke and can't even afford to drive around in order to leave the house. It's too hot to walk anywhere (aside from the pool). Did I mention that I'm alone a lot more?
The transition from London back to Virginia has been okay. I don't want to say it was easy or effortless, because there were a couple of days when I couldn't even be bothered to leave my room to brush my teeth. I was consumed with my sadness as if it were the end of the world now and I had to figure out how to be this New Sam in my Old World. I found it hard to not be able to ring people up, walk down the corridor to the kitchen or to someone else's room and have a conversation with one of my friends. I looked out the window and instead of seeing people walking around campus, I saw trees, random animals and more suburbs.
Where was everyone?
Luckily, one of my friends from London came over to visit for about a week. It was amazing having Lizzie here in the house, if only because it was another human being I could talk to throughout the day and have someone be near. We had a nice combination of relaxing and exploring, and the nice thing was that we were both going through the same experience of transitioning from Uni Life back into Real Life. I could properly chat to her who knew everything from the past three years and it was comforting to know that I wasn't the only one feeling this way at this particular time.
It was also nice to be able to take her around my neck of the woods, and whilst everything was new to Lizzie, I was rediscovering my old life and realized that where I live doesn't suck as bad as I thought it did. True, it's no London with it's high streets, collection of foreign accents and a pub on every corner, but it does have it's own perks that I forgot I missed so much. Like, Chipotle.
Of course once Lizzie left to spend her remaining days in Washington D.C., I was bound to the house once again and left to my own devices for entertainment. I decided to start applying to jobs since Momma's "connection" at her job has still yet to respond to me after she got in contact about two weeks ago. Momma says that there's "still hope" and I should be hearing something "really soon," but I'm just so damn impatient.
I also found out this week that I'm 30 credits short from graduating. Hooray! That's what every unemployed student wants to hear. I can't even put on my CV that I have a BA yet, because I'm 30 CREDITS SHORT. I don't understand my university sometimes.
I thought that not graduating this month would be a lot harder for me to handle, but part of me already kind of knew that it was too good to be true. Something was going to happen and prevent me from getting the diploma, because that's just how my university life has been since day one. They weren't going to give it to me just like that. I'd have to suffer a little longer. It's just annoying if anything.
Because of my shortfall, I have to take an online module that is only 20 credits. My convener said she's going to try and see if The Board will waive the last ten credits, but if she can't then we'll have to find another way for me acquire the final ten. And my online assignment is another proposal that's due in by the end of November will monthly email check-ups by one of my lecturer or my convener.
This summer hasn't been peaches and cream, but it hasn't sucked entirely either I suppose. All I really want right now is a job. That's all I keep thinking about. And until then I'll just sleep. Maybe I'll even go back to the pool and sleep in the never ending sun.